Quality Time
The time you spend with your child is precious. As any parent of a grown child will tell you, time flies by much too quickly. Looking back most parents think “I wish I had spent more time with my child.” So take the time to spend time with your child as much as possible.
Parents have many other responsibilities that can get in the way of spending time with children. The term quality time was created with this dilemma in mind. The term was created when experts found that parents were too busy working, taking care of the house, running errands, and focusing on other responsibilities to spend much time with their children. Many parents felt that scheduling time with their children would help them to spend meaningful time with their child. But quality time does not have to be scheduled. Quality time can be anytime you are with your child. There are many times throughout the day when we may be shopping, waiting in line, driving to school, or getting ready for bed when we have a few moments of downtime. Use this time as quality time with your child. Parents can turn this time into fun and sneak in a little intellectual stimulation, too.
So, how can you turn waiting time into quality time? The best place to start is by paying attention to your child and talk to him. Ask a question and really listen to his answer. Ask your child’s opinion and take it seriously.
You can ask a serious question or a silly one. Some examples might be asking your child to describe something he sees while you are driving in the car, and you can guess what he sees. You can ask a younger child to find something red or blue, or count a certain color car as you drive by. Start a discussion by asking about things your child is interested in, you might ask a child who likes dinosaurs which dinosaur he would want to be and then find out why he chose that dinosaur. Have your child imagine she was a superhero, then ask her to describe her powers. Tell your child what your favorite dinosaur is or what superpower you would want too. This can spark a lively discussion and you will both learn a lot about each other.
How about adding quality time to dinner preparation? Instead of parking your child in front of the TV or a video game, involve him in your dinner preparations. Children can help with meal preparations, setting the table and clean up. If you do these things together you are having some quality time together. Depending on their age, kids can wash or chop vegetables, read a recipe, measure ingredients, stir and mix, and lots of other jobs in the kitchen. Kids will be learning while they are doing, and keep up the conversation! Cooking time is a great time to talk about foods you like and foods your child likes.
Waiting time in a doctors office is easy to turn into quality time with a few markers or crayons and some paper. Carry a notebook and you can draw together while you have a few minutes to wait. You don’t have to be an accomplished artist, just have fun doing it. You can draw a picture together, draw a story, or even draw a picture and write a story about your picture. Of course, the old standby of the tic tac toe games or hangman is great fun for kids too.
Bathtime can easily turn into quality time. Science experiments are fun and easy to clean up in the tub. Make a volcano with baking soda and vinegar, experiment with different objects that sink or float, try to sink a boat by pouring water into it. There are lots of fun things to do in the tub with your child.
Quality time at bedtime is easy too; read a book together! Talk about your day, and maybe about what you will do tomorrow.
Of course, the common denominator of all quality time activities is paying attention to your child. Talk to your child, listen to his answers, ask her opinions, and you will be well on the way to a better relationship with your child. Use all of the small moments of your day to spend time with your children. Remember, they grow up fast!
If you want some ideas about things to do for quality time that are free or inexpensive, the book “Quality Time Anytime” by Penny Warner has lots of great ideas. It’s available in the Lending Library at Cooperative Extension. Come check it out for free along with our other parenting resources
